Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Time does that tricky thing

Days squeeze past me like eggs from a chicken.

No no, that doesn't work.

Time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin'... into the future.

Well that's certainly not news. It's been NINE years since I started this blog. Nine years ago I took up another mantle, something else to feed and care for. Nine years since I had the thought that I could take on more.

Occasionally I think I can take on more -- but not so often any more. Things I've done since I started this blog, actually eight and a half years ago: fallen in love, multiple times; had my heart broken, multiple times; found that a friend I thought I had I did not, multiple times.  I've misspent my money and only occasionally really regretted it. I had a Vespa and I crashed it, resulting in my first and only (knock on wood) ambulance ride. I started practicing martial arts, stopped (after the crash), and started again. I almost got married again. I've changed jobs, but only once.

In all this time I have been living alone, although I did nearly move in with a woman, only to wind up moving in with a different friend. I've learned to be more silent, to tell less. Even now I scan through these words to wonder if I'm saying too much.  I learned to hold back, to not reply, to not answer, and just sit in silence.

More often I wish I had less... less crap in my apartment, less dust and fewer dishes.  Less time spent at work, knotting my muscles in my shoulders over a keyboard and mouse, doing things I have little desire to do, though they pay me. They pay me and I persist. I haven't found enough courage to forge out on my own. Maybe one day.... 

Saturday, June 13, 2015

Columbo loses his shit over Faye Dunaway,
who is not really paying attention to him at all

Yeah okay, I thought maybe I was tripping. But I verified it. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106589/reviews-8

That smokin' hot version of Faye Dunaway is flirting BIG TIME with the chick from Rome. 

I almost lost it. 

I was like -- I know it's June an' all. Pride and all. But....

Damn, I love Columbo. 

Thursday, March 12, 2015

The time in Greece, in case you wanted to know that.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Not ETS Approved Or Otherwise High Scoring Prose

I sit with my fingers on the keyboard, pensive and stuck, frozen by the photos sliding by on the laptop screen. These are the images I’ve captured over the last several months, either by camera on my phone or maybe a screen capture. They span years, actually, and re-tell the story of my life in a disjointed timeline, occasionally not referencing me at all. Maybe they are just ideas I had, or a friend had. Or an element of society at the time. Something that whizzed by. A beautiful woman. A bear.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Monday, October 20, 2014

Too Late, Too Long

My eyes are tired and always closing
If I sit still long enough, I will fall asleep
For me, this means I am old

My neck hurts, my knees hurt
For me, this means I am old

When I sit still long enough and think about
the ones I've loved,
what it feels like to lie in bed on a lazy afternoon
with sunlight streaming through the windows
setting dust mites to sparkle
and time stands still as you
hold hands
touch noses
gaze into the eyes of one you love

how long has it been?

I have had that. More than once I have had a
blissful moment of
crazy love
And More Than Once
I have appreciated the hell outta that moment

I have

I didn't let it go to waste.

Friday, December 28, 2012

obstinate

the muscles under my scalp are stretched too thin
they crisp and buckle when I turn my head
the sun sneaks inside my closed eyelids
miami blue shocks of electricity dance across
the field of vision of a closed eye
I turn, strain my neck and push against the world

I stand, short but firm
and stand against the world